Starting Over, There Are Levels To Life
The more and more I contribute to this blog is the more I can electronically see my journey. It has become less of a diary and more of a road map to my emotional maturity. I wanted to share apart of my on-going life story in May because I have been promoting this month's #mentalhealthawareness . I want to remind everyone that if you need to take time for yourself, there is no shame in it. The only person you need to take care of is you sometimes, and that is always going to be your main priority in life.
I just submitted two different script ideas to two separate writing competitions. Writing has been and will always be a way for me to escape everything. I think everyone should attempt journaling. When I am having a bad day I want to let those emotions play their part just as much as they do on the good days. Being creative is an outlet for me to remain artistic all while sharing what we go through as human beings. We all really have something unique to add to the layers that make up the universe. At this current stage in my life, relationships, and career I feel like I've hit the hard reset button.
HARD RESETS
You know the computer helped raise us. I sometimes think that our brains are wired to fit into this new fast paced technological world. It makes for great metaphors. When we keep our desktops running for weeks on end we eventually notice that things begin to slow down. Sometimes you just need to shut down. It is the same for some of us who have worked the majority of their life just trying to define their "happiness" and reach a certain level of success. In reality, something happens drastically to us that allows us to see this. Its like the blue screen error of life. No matter how many times you restart it won't be long before you crash again. Why does this happen to us?
Mainly because we are alive and kicking. Most people do not chase after any goal in life and in fact go from situation to situation only rationalizing why they even exist. Yeah, its that real at times. For the rest of us who are not the "living dead" we are faced with tremendous failures. The reason we even feel like we have failed or are not to the standard that we want to be is due to the fact that there is no instruction manual for the life we are creating for ourselves. In these moments we feel so irritated by our dreams and our circumstances that it causes us to internalize negative feelings. This is why wellness is always going to be something we need to make sure we are in tuned with. It's okay to feel the feelings of failure, it is what catapults you to that next level. You should however understand that you are not failing, more so just trying everything you can to find your way.
YOU MENTALLY GET TIRED OF YOURSELF
In keeping with the negative emotions that pop up when we feel low, we sometimes also get bored and annoyed with our own decision making and choices. It is so easy to live in regret; to not count the blessings but to survey all the storms. Again, we are only human. It is all about how you choose to reinvent yourself after and during each setback. There will be many depending on the type of life you are trying to create. For me, going to school and graduating during the recession is something that always makes me feel low. Before I became an "entrepreneur" more so a visionary, I was so lost as to what my life would be about. I never even thought once about owning my own lane in anything but not finding work and having to pay back student loan debt by myself forced me to look outside the box. That was almost ten years ago. There are tons of stories about folks like me working full time jobs and living at home. It is true, financial setbacks are the hardest to overcome but it is not money that will free you, it's the way you chose to live. You cannot go back a relive the old chapters of your life book but you can go back to relearn a few lessons that you may have missed. It is helpful to reflect positively. If I didn't go to college I would not have learned to speak up about issues that concern me like prison reform and the results mass incarceration has had on specific communities. I would also not have learned how to discipline myself. College was not an easy road emotionally, I was dealing with a lot of family issues at the time. But I never quit. I would cry but never not go. You push yourself. You train yourself to stay strong during the storm. I always have those moments to help me in the present and I'm sure in the future. I also know that what I feel about this, is not a lonely feeling, a lot of people are in the same exact boat as me.
PULLING THE PLUG
Do you even know who you are when you are constantly changing? If you are defined by "what you do" then the answer will be, nah. If you are defined by how you operate then the person you are now will not be the same person you are in lets say 3-5 years. As humans we grow through evolving from one state of mind to another. If you start to become a person who you don't truly know then it is time to pull the plug for a reset. Again, this usually comes with some type of milestone or life altering scenario but the choice we make to change the direction of our sails is the power of reinvention. Creativity is required. Thinking outside of the box is necessary. Growing up is inevitable. Its sort of the same power we get when we say "no" to someone. It is the momentary selfishness that protects our state of mind which helps us to mature. You will get tired of yourself mentally and in these moments you revert back to the you that YOU love. Forget about impressing others. What is the point if you don't like yourself.
I have always been some sort of a realist in a way where I can logically pin point what I should do. A big part of that is having a glass is half full sort of approach to life and to obstacles. I trained my mind to be strong but also to be able to quickly withstand change. When I had to reprogram after college it caused a ripple effect throughout my entire life. I changed my behaviors, I changed my social circle, I changed the way I viewed my goals and my accomplishments. It was prior to I guess my current state, the most transitionary period of my life. I had always dreamed but I followed the path that I logically thought would help me. When I couldn't find a minimum wage job with a Masters degree I realized that what I have and who I am has a value. It wasn't a cheap number either. I taught myself how to become a start up. I researched how folks like Oprah Winfrey, Steve Jobs, and Jeff Bezos found their way. They simply believed that they could do it. They worked harder than they did at their previous jobs and they did not give up when it got tricky. In fact, they sacrificed almost everything. I knew I could do it too. No matter how many times you fall or get knocked down, never stay down.
That's the one piece of advice I can share about dream chasing. You might have to start over but that's okay because you've got something amazing to offer.
PEACE X LOVE
T
I just submitted two different script ideas to two separate writing competitions. Writing has been and will always be a way for me to escape everything. I think everyone should attempt journaling. When I am having a bad day I want to let those emotions play their part just as much as they do on the good days. Being creative is an outlet for me to remain artistic all while sharing what we go through as human beings. We all really have something unique to add to the layers that make up the universe. At this current stage in my life, relationships, and career I feel like I've hit the hard reset button.
HARD RESETS
You know the computer helped raise us. I sometimes think that our brains are wired to fit into this new fast paced technological world. It makes for great metaphors. When we keep our desktops running for weeks on end we eventually notice that things begin to slow down. Sometimes you just need to shut down. It is the same for some of us who have worked the majority of their life just trying to define their "happiness" and reach a certain level of success. In reality, something happens drastically to us that allows us to see this. Its like the blue screen error of life. No matter how many times you restart it won't be long before you crash again. Why does this happen to us?
Mainly because we are alive and kicking. Most people do not chase after any goal in life and in fact go from situation to situation only rationalizing why they even exist. Yeah, its that real at times. For the rest of us who are not the "living dead" we are faced with tremendous failures. The reason we even feel like we have failed or are not to the standard that we want to be is due to the fact that there is no instruction manual for the life we are creating for ourselves. In these moments we feel so irritated by our dreams and our circumstances that it causes us to internalize negative feelings. This is why wellness is always going to be something we need to make sure we are in tuned with. It's okay to feel the feelings of failure, it is what catapults you to that next level. You should however understand that you are not failing, more so just trying everything you can to find your way.
YOU MENTALLY GET TIRED OF YOURSELF
In keeping with the negative emotions that pop up when we feel low, we sometimes also get bored and annoyed with our own decision making and choices. It is so easy to live in regret; to not count the blessings but to survey all the storms. Again, we are only human. It is all about how you choose to reinvent yourself after and during each setback. There will be many depending on the type of life you are trying to create. For me, going to school and graduating during the recession is something that always makes me feel low. Before I became an "entrepreneur" more so a visionary, I was so lost as to what my life would be about. I never even thought once about owning my own lane in anything but not finding work and having to pay back student loan debt by myself forced me to look outside the box. That was almost ten years ago. There are tons of stories about folks like me working full time jobs and living at home. It is true, financial setbacks are the hardest to overcome but it is not money that will free you, it's the way you chose to live. You cannot go back a relive the old chapters of your life book but you can go back to relearn a few lessons that you may have missed. It is helpful to reflect positively. If I didn't go to college I would not have learned to speak up about issues that concern me like prison reform and the results mass incarceration has had on specific communities. I would also not have learned how to discipline myself. College was not an easy road emotionally, I was dealing with a lot of family issues at the time. But I never quit. I would cry but never not go. You push yourself. You train yourself to stay strong during the storm. I always have those moments to help me in the present and I'm sure in the future. I also know that what I feel about this, is not a lonely feeling, a lot of people are in the same exact boat as me.
PULLING THE PLUG
Do you even know who you are when you are constantly changing? If you are defined by "what you do" then the answer will be, nah. If you are defined by how you operate then the person you are now will not be the same person you are in lets say 3-5 years. As humans we grow through evolving from one state of mind to another. If you start to become a person who you don't truly know then it is time to pull the plug for a reset. Again, this usually comes with some type of milestone or life altering scenario but the choice we make to change the direction of our sails is the power of reinvention. Creativity is required. Thinking outside of the box is necessary. Growing up is inevitable. Its sort of the same power we get when we say "no" to someone. It is the momentary selfishness that protects our state of mind which helps us to mature. You will get tired of yourself mentally and in these moments you revert back to the you that YOU love. Forget about impressing others. What is the point if you don't like yourself.
I have always been some sort of a realist in a way where I can logically pin point what I should do. A big part of that is having a glass is half full sort of approach to life and to obstacles. I trained my mind to be strong but also to be able to quickly withstand change. When I had to reprogram after college it caused a ripple effect throughout my entire life. I changed my behaviors, I changed my social circle, I changed the way I viewed my goals and my accomplishments. It was prior to I guess my current state, the most transitionary period of my life. I had always dreamed but I followed the path that I logically thought would help me. When I couldn't find a minimum wage job with a Masters degree I realized that what I have and who I am has a value. It wasn't a cheap number either. I taught myself how to become a start up. I researched how folks like Oprah Winfrey, Steve Jobs, and Jeff Bezos found their way. They simply believed that they could do it. They worked harder than they did at their previous jobs and they did not give up when it got tricky. In fact, they sacrificed almost everything. I knew I could do it too. No matter how many times you fall or get knocked down, never stay down.
That's the one piece of advice I can share about dream chasing. You might have to start over but that's okay because you've got something amazing to offer.
PEACE X LOVE
T
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